Following a good Vlog post by Mark at CoachCommons, I scrambled into my coaching notes to run down a list of the top 10 situations where people experience cognitive dissonance.
Saved that from a book from Dr. David Burns
- All or nothing: For you, there are good guys and bad guys…
- Generalizing:You turn that grain of sand into a great big mountain !
- Mental filter:You see everything through dark glasses.
- Shrugging positives: You do great things BUT it’s not worth mentioning, it’s only you…
- Jumping to conclusion: No fact? Who cares YOU’RE RIGHT! You assume…everything/self fulfilling prophecy
- Dramatize and minimize: You downplay the great stuff until they look small
- Emotional reasoning: HOW you feel is WHAT you are…. You can’t be that bad.you wouldn’t be reading this blog :-)
- The “should”: Everybody SHOULD do this, do that. No one should “should over themselves” like that!
- Negative branding: For you or others. One mistake and BANG …HOT-IRON BRANDING
- Blaming: Here again, it’s you or someone. You always have someone to blame
Do you recognize yourself in one of these situations ?
Remember Toughts lead to Feelings that lead to the Actions that bring Results
If you don’t like the Results you have change the Actions you take!
And if you can’t help but act the way you do, look at the feelings behind the actions…and the thoughts behind the feelings.
Use that list to identify what cognitive dissonance you’ll start correcting RIGHT NOW!
Change some thoughts
You’ll FEEL GOOD about it.
You’ll act accordingly
Ans new results will follow.
As for myself, these days, I’m guilty of number 4. Now I’ve got to work on those 2 Online programs….